Can Your Ex be Completely X'd Out of Your Life?

There are many people who would prefer not to ever see or hear from their ex ever again.

Unfortunately, it is only possible when you have no kids together. When a parent tries to obliterate any presence of the other parent from their child's life only because of their own personal feelings towards the other parent, this really only harms the child. Unless there are real safety concerns, do not deprive your child of having a relationship with the other parent.

Even if you have a new partner who is great with your child and you would prefer to have your partner assume the parent role, don't tell your child that your partner is their Dad now. Also, do not have them call your partner "Dad", "Daddy" or any other derivative. Not only is it confusing but it creates loyalty issues for your child. The best thing to do is to acknowledge that the other parent remains a parent and consider your child fortunate to have a step parent who cares.

When your children grow up and there is not the need to communicate about visitations, etc. you may think you no longer have to deal with the other parent, Not necessarily so, there are situations when you will have to. There are events in your adult children's lives which they will want to share with their parents. There is graduation, marriages, birth of grandchildren, deaths, etc. Recognize that this is about your children, not you, not your ex. Be happy for your children and be grateful they still want you in their lives.

You may have an Ex but when you have children they can't be completely X'd out.

Stay tuned for more Beyond Divorce to Happiness posts.